you know, sometimes i really hate this city. it's too small. it smells like piss and poo nearly everywhere you walk. there are too many hills that are too steep to climb every goddam day. i step on crack pipes on my way home from work, and because of all the walking i have done i have busted through at least three pairs of black flats per year i've lived here. thats about fifteen pairs of black flats, if you count my oakland years. which my bank account counts them, so you should, too. san francisco is for people who want to live in portland, but have seasonal affective disorder. san francisco is for people who want to be cool, pretend like they're cool and hip and knowledgeable but really they're just insecure assholes. san francisco is sad to walk around, but even sadder on muni buses where people piss and freak out and go nuts and steal your iphone. so i've heard. i actually was on a bus where someone pissed and the driver wouldn't let him off. so you jump off to avoid the piss. and then you walk. and walk. and walk up a hill. and then you finally make it up the hill, and look across that vast bay to the marin headlands. you turn ninety degrees and see the bay bridge expanding past the ferry building. you turn ninety degrees and see the hill you just walked up, with a cable car chugging up it. you turn ninety degrees and see ONE MORE ONE MORE ONE MORE HILL. you turn ninety degrees again, and start walking those last few steps to home. up ten steps. up the elevator. into your apartment which you love love love. then you remember why you live in san francisco. and you love it.
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